A Youtube video featuring Dick Lee

back from redang

went for a short trip to redang with some friends over the past weekend, 190407 - 230407. itz a good short trip. relaxing. and the beach is damn beautiful

some pictures...

presentation to PSA

malingering, a word that i have not heard or seen or used ever since i ended army i think. hahaha... but somehow, i came across this word again during lunch just now.

anyway, i digress.

i've finished presenting to PSA my FYP.

fucking siong. almost died. and yesterday, was fucking stressed up at night, cos i suddenly realised a major error. Big error.

hahahahaha~~~

but everything is over. I can juz heck it and go. No longer do i need to care about this project anymore.

i got the fucking call up

all lot gather!!

23/07 to 28/07, see ya at sungei gedong. 6 fucking days to face brian ong.

of all day, today i get the fucking call up.

nabeh cheebye.

random thoughts

it has been a reasonably slack week. not that i have nothing to do, juz that i am not in too much a mood to complete them. i have 2 presentations to do next week, and a report due too.

for some reasons, i have lost a large part of motivation to do things. FYP is supposedly important, and thus i shld have spent some effort in my FYP presentation. but somehow it seems, i am not putting in much effort. i just want to get it over and done with.

lose steam, lose motivation, lose energy.

thatz it man. i am facing burnt out.

and cos of the free time, my mind tends to swing a little bit more unnecessarily. a huge lesson i have learnt a few years back during my stint as a leader in consonance is, itz always good to be in the unknown. knowing hits hard sometimes. thatz why people says, curiousity kills.

my mind has recently been more towards the negative, for some reasons. ever since army, restrospection is a part of life. just that after army, itz harder to set aside time to self-retrospect. in uni, normally the time i'm hit with the biggest shit, is the time i am least free. during holidays, everything are always good, so normally wun sudden go self-retrospect.

a free (but not so free) week like last week, suddenly i started to think about myself. retrospection goes 2 ways, and i went the not-so-pleasing way. i started to think about some of the stuffs, that i regretted that i have done. regret is a sickening thing. but the shit thing is, given the situation again, will i be able to do something differently? for some, i think i can. for some others, i started having self-doubts.

this brings along a series of thoughts. value-judgements mostly. value-judgements on myself.

then, some other things. things eventually lead to think. to come to terms with myself.

while this seems a little bleak, luckily i am a lazy person. so all things (think) have to come to an end. and i know, i have moved on and crossed myself on certain issues (wanted to say 过了自己这一关 in english. made a pretty bad attempt it seems, hah!), not all.

but heck, FYP presentation on monday. Present the same thing to PSA on tuesday. And then, i juz wait to graduate, hopefully safely. then, i shall fuck off this place that i badly wanted to join when i was in army.

come to think of it... what a joke.

rejected

this morning, i had a hunch that i will receive a reply from P&G regarding my job application to them. and true enough, my hunch was correct.

when i get to the lab at around 10:10, i signed in to my gmail account, and there. An email from P&G. As for the content of the email, the title of this post speaks for itself. haha~~~

sianz... a bit disappointed. but well, what can i do?

now, i have to start thinking, what should i do? should i continue to join tech? joining tech will be difficult to move on. while tech pays quite well, i think i will have limited opportunities to really train myself wholistically. tech is nonetheless a singapore firm. and the amount of OT that is in front of me, it might be a bit difficult to look for other jobs, or do any kind of upgrading.

do i want to join engineering, or semicon industry for the rest of my life? it sounds a bit sickening...

how how!??!?